Never understood
Your driving need
For me
To embrace your “God”.
Our worldviews
Are so vastly different
Often clashing
Against each other.
Best described
As a generation divide
Between us.
As a child
I’ve known this.
Trying to express
My needs
And failing.
How I despite
The male clothes
You laid out
For the church service.
Often
Passively fighting you
Against attending.
Regardless
How progressive
Or accepting
They are.
At what point
Do you realize
I’m not you
On this question?
I have
Never felt comfortable
In Christian churches.
Like I’m an outsider
Looking in.
Do you realize
How you anger me
With your constant asking
To attend church.
Whenever
I visit you.
Each repetitive request
Widens the gap
Between us.
And yet
You continue
With your requests.
Like you’re dealing
With a 4 year old child
Needing exposure
To a wider world.
And not
A grown adult
I’ve become.
Who rejects
The male dominated society
We live in.
Therisa © 2019
Author’s note: I started writing this poem, around 4 am EDT, after Star woke me, wanting
to playing with me.There are times, I want to tell her, “go play with Squeak”, but he’s
sound asleep. So, here I am, writing this poem about the religious difference, between my
mom and I.
The churches that my mom forced me, to attend, as a child, belonged to the United
Church of Canada. One of the progressive and accepting of the LGBTQ+ community.
Having fought for and passed Transgender rights legislation, federally and provincially
(Ontario). Just never felt comfortable, within a Christian Church. Especially, the male
dominated language used, for the symbols of power and spirituality.
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