Within my mind
The toxic game
Of "what if"
Is being played out.
As I castigate
Myself
For being
Too chicken
In not telling you
About my true self.
Although
I think
You knew
I was different
From the other kids.
Just that
You wanted me
To speak
These words
In confirming
Your hunch
I'm gay.
Not sure
Whether
I should be laughing
Or crying
Dad.
For your intuition
Is only
Half right
About me
Being gay.
Dad
You have
A daughter
And a son.
And not
the two sons
You went to
The grave
Believing.
Please
Forgive me
For waiting 7 years
After your death.
To tell
Your ashes
At the grave site.
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