Showing posts with label Suicidal depression. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Suicidal depression. Show all posts

Friday, 30 August 2019

Lost Opportunity? (August 20, 2019)

So easy
Lose oneself
In self-hate
And self-harming.

Never realizing
Until later. 

Societal barriers
Consciously erected
Falsely held protection.

Self-righteousness
Harming innocent people
Seeking help.

Maintaining a myth
Rigidly held definition
Of male/female.

Eleven years ago
Contacted Toronto crisis center 
For abused women.

Intake process
Humoured
Like I didn't matter.

Hanging up 
Ending that thread.

Drowning
In mental illness
And PTSD.

Doctor reads
Mental riot act
Seventy-two hour
Psych observation.

Somehow
Avoided this.

Little has changed
Past 11 years
For these crisis centers.

(Odd center
May help all
Cis/transwomen.

Exception
Not the rule.)

Fought tooth and nail
Against gender orientation
In Canada's criminal code 
And Human Rights Act.

Why?

Gender Critical Feminists
View transwomen
Agents provocateur
Under cismale's control 
Stealing rights earned.

Damage isn't limited
To those seeking help
Includes staff too.

Believing our presence
Revictimizes clients.

How do we prove
This is spurious
When denied
Chance to heal?

Or present unified front
For women's rights
In a growing hostile world.

Viewing all women
Second class citizens
To discriminate
Or abuse.

Therisa © 2019

Author’s note: The Gender Critical Feminists and the Conservative Senators failed to defeat the passage of C-16 (2016), during the 3rd and final reading of the Bill, which can into law, after Royal Assent, in June 19, 2017. The 7th time, that this type of legislation has been proposed in the House of Commons and Senate. In the previous attempts, this Bill has died for various precedicial reasons, by the govening party, at the time.

Saturday, 29 December 2018

Living With Darkness (December 20, 2018)

Chaotic thoughts riot
Across soulscape
Smoke and ash
Fill cerebral skies.


Raging without mercy
No quarters given
Nor asked.


Only answer
Outright victory
Regardless of cost.


Total war.


Knowing
There's no winners
Only degrees of losers.


Forced to rebuild
On tainted land
Memories of dark past.


Death seemed
Perfect solution
For soul’s peace
So long ago.


Ending this destructive loop
My life has become.


Breaking these walls
That imprison me
In despair.


Therisa © 2018


Author's note: This holiday season, will mark 8 years, since my last suicide attempt. Although, my suicidal thoughts, are never silent. For the most part, they are background noise that I'm able to ignore. Still I have to be careful with, where I'm at physically. So that I don't accidental hurt myself.


Before you ask, my prolonged bout of depression continues. So hard to remember the last time that I wasn't depressed, to some degree. Equilibrium seems so far away, like a fantasy story told to children.

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Chance Encounter (March 13, 2017)

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