After a week
Of revelations
In Washington D.C.
And personal discoveries.
Find myself
On a precipice
Asking:
How do we view
The #MeToo movement
On sexual harassment
And abuse?
Do we hold people
Like Judge Kavanaugh
Higher standard
Given position of power?
Are we
As a collective whole
Ready to accept
There's no excuse
For this behaviour?
I say people
This abuse knows
No gender divide.
And yes
I believe Dr Blaney Ford
In her allegations
Against Judge Kavanaugh.
Looking back
Kicking myself
So blind-missing this
My own #MeToo experiences.
Innocent seeming
Comments and jokes
Pejorative putdowns
Attacking identity/self-worth.
Feeling powerless
Protest to management
Be labelled antisocial
Affecting reviews/pay increases.
Came out transwoman (August 2006)
Small warehousing company
Mostly male employees
Quit-March 2007.
Stressful time
Buried deep
With other events.
Bitterly sighing
Fighting acidic tears
PTSD flashbacks.
Feel so dirty/violated
Nothing can scrub
This strain away.
Never told anyone
Dark secret
From the 1980s.
Two particular bullies
Throughout their attacks
Made homosexual comments.
Implying
I wanted oral sex
Never have.
With crude gestures
To groin region
Signalling sexual satisfaction
Before leaving me
Laughing.
Not sure
If we've fully understand
Paradigm shift
That #MeToo movement
Is demanding globally.
Specifically
Rejecting women (cis or trans)
As sexual object
To used and abused.
Witnessed
By the “old boy” circus
Of the Trump administration
And Republican control Congress.
But change
Is slowly coming
Addressing this imbalance
From the grassroots up.
For some
The change is
Too late.
Therisa © 2018
Author’s note: A day has past, since I wrote the above poem. Giving me, time to
reflect on the sharing of my abusive past, and the fact that I felt compelled to hide parts of it, for decades. I know, my own experiences aren't just limited to a small segment of the transcommunity, but cross over into the ciscommunity, as well. Whether or not, people want to admit to this reality. In denying that transwomen can be raped and sexually assaulted, like ciswomen are. Thus, refusing access to the healing programs available. I speak on this, my own personal experience, in being denied to a battered/abuse women program, because I'm a transwoman.
Another thing that struck me, this morning, is the way, which young boys are socialized. A
sense of entitlement that they're superior to girls, thus deserving special preferential
treatment. This strikes at the heart of the #MeToo movement, as it tries to stop this centuries
old attitude that women need/use sex to advance themselves, in the wider world.
Honestly, I don't understand, how anyone can vote for a creepy politician, like Donald Trump.
Who uses and abuses women, without a second thought, like his handling of female
reporters.
I see the #MeToo movement, as the next wave of feminism, without the stigma that feminism
currently has, in many segments of society. Realistically, the opening salvos from the
#MeToo movement, have been successful in removing blatant abusers, from their position of
power. The next and hardest step, is reeducating people to move beyond sexualized of
others, and accept based upon merit and ability.
FYI: This poem is part of a 4 poem set that I have completed, from September 27-October 1,
2018. Exploring some of the issues, I have to/have faced, in regaining mental health
equilibrium, as I walk my healing journal.
Truthfully, I have serious doubts about posting these poems, given the personal nature and
how people will react to them. Especially, as the #MeToo movement has primarily focused
on ciswomen experiences, ignoring what transwomen are facing on the daily basis, in the
workplace and elsewhere. As some feminists have expressed very transphobic attitudes
towards transwomen and the transcommunity. Last thing, I want to do, is spread this
fight into other forums, hurting innocent bystanders.
Written for Poets United’s midweek motif, using the word prompt: balance.
