Showing posts with label part of healing journey. Show all posts
Showing posts with label part of healing journey. Show all posts

Saturday, 28 May 2016

My Butterfly Effect (May 28, 2016)

A simple mistake
In misreading
The 519* support group
Schedule.

Finding myself
Standing
Before
The wrong group.

Brimming full
With destructive anger
And corrosive pain
From mom's rejection.

Just two weeks
Previously
On the Canada Day
Long weekend.

Looking for
A safe shelter
To ease my burden
With those
Who would understand.

Timidly
I enter
The group room.

Only then
Did I realize
My blunder.

Shaking
Like an autumn leaf
In a September breeze.

I asked
The F2M group
For a kind ear
To listen to
My story.

As I released
The pent-up energy
In a healing circle.

Never realizing
Until later.

A simple "no"
From them.

And I
No longer
Among the living
That weekend.

Or graced
By the lasting
And healing friendship
Of Z.

This July
We'll celebrate
Ten years
Of this mistake.

Therisa © 2016

Author's note: After my mom's rejection of me, on Canada Day 2006, I had spun down, into the blackest depression, which, almost cost me, my life and job, at the time. With the help of Z, I have been rebuilding my life, ever since. Will admit, there are times, I feel overwhelm, by everything that has happened to me, especially, during the flashbacks, and crippling anxiety attacks.

*519: a community centre, in Toronto, that serves the needs of local residents and the LGBT+ community of the greater Toronto area. It's called, the 519, due to its address, 519 Church St, in the heart of Toronto's gay village.

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