Wednesday, 18 May 2016

Not A Victimless Crime (May 18, 2016)

Bullying
A word
That's forever etched
In my mind.

For
I don't need anyone
To tell me
What it means
To be bullied.

As I struggle
With my recovery
After decades
Of bullying.

From chronic depression
Various anxiety disorders
Suicidal thoughts
Agoraphobia
And PTSD.

Which
Is worsen
By being trans.

In doubling
My odds
Over the general population.

For suffering
Depression anxiety
Compulsive behaviour
(like self-harming)
And PTSD.

Would give anything
To never have experience
Night terrors
Or PTSD flashbacks
In my sleep.

As I'm plagued
By chronic insomnia
To the point.

A good night is
Having five hours
Of  uninterrupted
Sleep.

Welcome
To my world.

Therisa © 2016

Author's note: Whether, or not, people realize this, but bullying (A form of abuse) is, a crime of power, which won't go away, as long as, there two or more people, in a given locale . The best, we can hope, is to limit the damage that's done, to the victims, by the aggressor.

19 comments:

  1. Yikes! Vivid depiction of night-time residuals from being the victim of bullying. May those who are the victims of Bullying get their sleep/relief time and also experience the love of many allies standing up for them. And may the phenomena of bullying end. Thank you for writing this.

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    Replies
    1. Sadly, Susan, the PTSD flashbacks can occur, at any time of the day. Once, they do happen, it takes several days, before I am fully recovered, from an episode. Wish that was true, for everyone, but my worse abuser, was from my own family, my younger brother.

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  2. Bully is a word that puts civilization to shame. Wish that word never existed let alone its practitioners. Sigh.

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    Replies
    1. So do I, Sumana, but it's part of life, and we need to limit the damage, which bullies cause. The difference is, people are more open, about reporting it to others, then in the past.

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  3. The result of bullying is far-reaching and extensive, as you have revealed, Therisa. And the problem seems to be growing worse, as we begin to see gun violence in Canada, unusual just a few years ago. We need a kindness revolution, and for teachers and parents to be proactive when they see a child with a tendency to bully. Zero tolerance. It is sad how long-lasting the effects are, to the victims.

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    Replies
    1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    2. We have lost touch, of what it means, to be human and compassionate, to each other, Sherry. In hiding behind technology, for our interactions, with each other. Forgetting, the person, who's reading our comments, can't tell or see our face, to realize, if we're joking or not. Counting on the anonymous nature of the web, to hide behind, after flaming someone, for being different or creative, in how they live their life, or express themselves. Sadly, too many people are just down right rude and crude, in their on-line behaviour, towards others.

      Zero tolerance, is a goal, we must stride for, but also, realize, its not always practice to achieve, in today's society. I say this, as someone, who has experienced bullying (trans-bashing and abusive behaviour, throughout my entire life) and the damage, it can do, to one's soul and body. Must say, today's teachers and parents don't have the time or energy needed to counterbalance this plague. Especially, the institutional barriers that exist, within the school system and society, itself. Wish, I had a "one size, fits all", but each situation is different, and must be judged, accordingly.

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  4. Such a poignant write Therisa, no doubt bullying can cause trauma and effect us in ways unimaginable. Big hugs to you!

    Lots of love,
    Sanaa

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    Replies
    1. Thank you, Sanaa, your kindness and huge heart.

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  5. Thank you for opening up your soul for this. Esp liked
    "In doubling
    My odds
    Over the general population." Great write.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Buddah, found that quote, while researching the odds on Canada's trans-community and the rate of suicide attempts, among us. Unlike the US, there are not published stats for Canada.

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  6. How important it is to be different, to walk the less traveled path. All the best people do. New ideas, creativity, and seeing beauty everywhere are the hallmarks of such people. You are welcome.

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    Replies
    1. And yet, society rewards those, who confront, to its norms, Old Egg. Often punishing those, who don't.

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  7. You have really given a vivid picture of what it is like to live with the after-effects of being bullied. I agree with Sherry that we do need a kindness revolution. Tolerance for individual differences as well!

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    Replies
    1. Thank you, Mary. The issue of bullying and rejection of those, who are different, has been around, since humanity slung two syllables together to form a word. Only now, are people, like myself, coming forward and sharing our experiences and pain, with the wider world. And news of suicides aren't being filtered by society and the grieving families, with the advent of social media. Whether or not, your last two hopes are carried out, I hope so, but I'm a dreamer.

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  8. A really vividly painted, disturbing picture... showing the long lasting after effects!

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    Replies
    1. Truly wished, I didn't have the memories or experiences, to share, like this, Uma.

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  9. Bullying is a form of abuse and unfortunately bullies don't 'grow out of it' rather transfer it to the home and/or workplace or indeed anyone they view as a possible victim.
    Kind regards
    Anna :o]

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    Replies
    1. Sadly, I have experienced this truth, all too well, Anna. Only wish, it wasn't the case.

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